Thoughts

Thoughts!!!

I thought I finally knew what I want to be…

I thought I finally knew where I belong…

I thought I finally found my dream…

But here I am, can’t even see my future.

Everything’s so blurry.

The things that I used to believe before seem to disappear little by little.

I thought he’d never give up on us. What happened?

I thought he loved me. Maybe he did. It’s just not enough love to stand for me.

He said it didn’t fade away…

He said it just knows deep down that “it’s not going to work out.”

It knows deep down that IT IS NOT GOING TO WORK OUT. This line just won’t stop flashing my mind. It’s like making a countdown ‘til I’m broken down into pieces.

I thought he said he’s sure of what he felt about me.

I thought he said I am it for him.

I thought he said there is no one else that he would want to be with.

I thought he asked me to marry him…

Whatever happened to love and promises? I think that is the most painful thought of all. To believe, to hope, and to wonder why, how and what happened? Some questions just don’t have an answer. I just wish all these thoughts will soon get out of my head. I wish there’s an easy way out of this pain. I wish it doesn’t hurt this much. But life is unpredictable. Sometimes, things happen even when you never thought it would.

*This is based on a past experience. Thoughts written here are done and over with.